It Felt Love - Hafiz

It Felt Love

How

Did the rose

Ever open its heart

And give to this world

All its

Beauty?

It felt the encouragement of light

Against its

Being,

Otherwise,

We all remain

Too

Frightened.

Your mother and my mother by Hafiz

fear is the cheapest room in the house.
i would like to see you living
in better conditions.

for your mother and my mother
were friends.

i know the innkeeper
in this part of the universe.
get some rest tonight,
come to my verse again tomorrow.
we'll go speak to the Friend together.

i should not make any promises right now,
but i know if you
pray
somewhere in this world -
something good will happen.

god wants to see
more love and playfulness in your eyes
for that is your greatest witness to him.

your soul and my soul
once sat together in the Beloved's womb
playing footsie.

your heart and my heart
are very, very old
Friends.

The Perfect High

There once was a boy named Gimme-Some-Roy...
He was nothin' like me or you,
'cause laying back and getting high
was all he cared to do.

As a kid, he sat in the cellar...
sniffing airplane glue.
And then he smoked banana peels,
when that was the thing to do.
He tried aspirin in Coca-Cola,
he breathed helium on the sly,
and his life became an endless search
to find the perfect high.

But grass just made him wanna lay back
and eat chocolate-chip pizza all night,
and the great things he wrote when he was stoned
looked like shit in the morning light.

Speed made him wanna rap all day,
reds laid him too far back,
Cocaine-Rose was sweet to his nose,
but the price nearly broke his back.

He tried PCP, he tried THC,
but they never quite did the trick.
Poppers nearly blew his heart,
mushrooms made him sick.
Acid made him see the light,
but he couldn't remember it long.
Hash was a little too weak,
and smack was a lot too strong.
Quaaludes made him stumble,
booze just made him cry,
Then he heard of a cat named Baba Fats
who knew of the perfect high.

Now, Baba Fats was a hermit cat...
lived high up in Nepal,
High on a craggy mountain top,
up a sheer and icy wall.

"Well, hell!" says Roy,
"I'm a healthy boy,
and I'll crawl or climb or fly,
Till I find that guru
who'll give me the clue
as to what's the perfect high."

So out and off goes Gimme-Some-Roy,
to the land that knows no time,
Up a trail no man could conquer,
to a cliff no man could climb.
For fourteen years he climbed that cliff...
back down again he'd slide . . .
He'd sit and cry, then climb some more,
pursuing the perfect high.

Grinding his teeth,
coughing blood,
aching and shaking and weak,
Starving and sore,
bleeding and tore,
he reaches the mountain peak.
And his eyes blink red like a snow-blind wolf,
and he snarls the snarl of a rat,
As there in repose,
and wearing no clothes,
sits the god-like Baba Fats.

"What's happenin', Fats?" says Roy with joy,
"I've come to state my biz . . .
I hear you're hip to the perfect trip...
Please tell me what it is.
"For you can see," says Roy to he,
"I'm about to die,
So for my last ride, tell me,
how can I achieve the perfect high?"

"Well, dog my cats!" says Baba Fats.
"Another burned out soul,
Who's lookin' for an alchemist
to turn his trip to gold.
It isn't in a dealer's stash,
or on a druggist's shelf...
Son, if you would find the perfect high,
find it in yourself."

"Why, you jive mother-fucker!" says Roy,
"I climbed through rain and sleet,
I froze three fingers off my hands,
and four toes off my feet!
I braved the lair of the polar bear,
I've tasted the maggot's kiss.
Now, you tell me the high is in myself?
What kinda shit is this?

My ears, before they froze off," says Roy,
"had heard all kindsa crap;
But I didn't climb for fourteen years
to hear your sophomore rap.
And I didn't climb up here to hear
that the high is on the natch,
So you tell me where the real stuff is,
or I'll kill your guru ass!"

"Okay...okay," says Baba Fats,
"You're forcin' it outta me...
There is a land beyond the sun
that's known as Zabolee.
A wretched land of stone and sand,
where snakes and buzzards scream,
And in this devil's garden blooms
the mystic Tzutzu tree.

Now, once every ten years it blooms one flower,
as white as the Key West sky,
And he who eats of the Tzutzu flower
shall know the perfect high.
For the rush comes on like a tidal wave...
hits like the blazin' sun.
And the high? It lasts forever,
and the down don't never come.

But, Zabolee Land is ruled by a giant,
who stands twelve cubits high,
And with eyes of red in his hundred heads,
he awaits the passer-by.
And you must slay the red-eyed giant,
and swim the river of slime,
Where the mucous beasts await to feast
on those who journey by.
And if you slay the giant and beasts,
and swim the slimy sea,
There's a blood-drinking witch who sharpens her teeth
as she guards the Tzutzu tree."

"Well, to hell with your witches and giants," says Roy,
"To hell with the beasts of the sea--
Why, as long as the Tzutzu flower still blooms,
hope still blooms for me."
And with tears of joy in his sun-blind eyes,
he slips the guru a five,
And crawls back down the mountainside,
pursuing the perfect high.

"Well, that is that," says Baba Fats,
sitting back down on his stone,
Facing another thousand years of talking to God, alone.
"Yes, Lord, it's always the same...
old men or bright-eyed youth...
It's always easier to sell 'em some shit
than it is to tell them the truth."

Shel Silverstein

Moon River

Tonight I watched Breakfast at Tiffany's on a movie screen.

...Best...experience...EVER!

The theater was small and cozy and absolutely charming! Outside, the facade of the building was fitted with a red overhang, some subtle neon lights, display windows, and minor flood lights which allowed me to watch the slight drizzle as we stood in line. Inside, the screening room was small and the screen not much bigger than some large TVs. The seats were lush and red and very narrow. The walls were red and there was a small stage that made me think of the possibility of live plays. The movie itself was wonderful. I laughed, and I cried. The music moved me, and I was so content at the end. so wonderful. I sort of feel as if I'm only just now seeing Breakfast at Tiffany's, truly, for the first time.

I'm now obsessed with watching classic movies in these charming small theaters, which are sprinkled throughout Paris. absolutely obsessed!

Photographic Evidence

Here is some proof that I'm actually in Paris: Ha! No, this is me in Finland. Of course. But, I did get the directions to Paris while I was there:



Here is my apartment:

This is the overall view of the place






This is the living room






And here are the essentials of Parisian life: wine, coffee, and bread! I just bought that silver espresso maker, and I love it. I have cheese and chocolate too, but I left them in the fridge. :D

Now, that I finally bought batteries for my camera, I hope to post more photos. Tomorrow, I am taking a brief tour of Paris. So, stay tuned...

Correlations

This comic from xkcd cracks me up.

Paris update

Two things:

1. I saw a lady today biking with a dog in her basket. I always thought that image was a stereotype, and not a true one. But there they were, both cute as can be. And the dog had a little visor on b/c it can get windy riding up front.

2. I have a new, very awesome apartment. There are so many wonderful things about where I am living. I am in the heart of Paris. I walk along the Seine and pass Notre Dame on my way to work.

...and there is a guy on the 2nd floor across the street playing the violin.

sigh.

So far so relaxing.

Knitters have amazing powers

Neil Gamon wrote a dark children's story called Coraline about a little girl who discovers an alternate version of her life through a secret passage. The story is being made into a 3D stop animation movie, which I am really looking forward to seeing. Here is a trailer to watch if you are interested:



The group creating this movie at Laika impressively crafted everything by hand. They are also creating a buzz around the movie by sending out mystery boxes to bloggers they admire. I found out about because Amy at knitty.com received a Coraline mystery box (number 8 our of 50 handmade personalized boxes). You can see the contents here.

However, I am writing this blog to point you to a short video about the creation of tiny knitted sweaters used in this movie. Go here and type in the code: sweaterxxs

amazing.

Cats have amazing powers

I think these will be all the rage this Christmas! Maybe I should get one for my nieces and nephew.

I'm still celebrating

Snow Globe

I had a fun weekend. I really enjoyed watching the snow which fell for hours Friday night. It was an adventure biking around in all of that fresh powder. The worst part was getting snow in my eyes while biking. It felt like icicles stabbing me in the eyeballs, and I needed ski goggles.

Anyway, here are some photos of the snow.















With all this beauty around me, can anyone explain while I'm feeling down today? Emotions are funny things. But, like the snow, they can not persist forever. They too will melt into new emotions soon enough.

Southern Finland -- Part II: Helsinki

This is part 2 of our trip to Southern Finland. These photos were all taken in Helsinki. We spent a Sunday afternoon and a Monday morning in Helsinki. It was rainy and cold, unfortunately. We couldn't use our umbrellas b/c the wind was knocking them around too much. It was quite comical, and we had to put the umbrellas away.

We started the visit Sunday by visiting the rock church:

I don't know why it looks like people are running for their lives in this photo. The church was beautiful and very peaceful.

The church view from the balcony:

This was my favorite part, lighting a prayer candle.




Here are some photos of the hotel room:


wait a minute. I thought this guy was the gardener at Turku castle. How'd he get into my room?



We spent most of Sunday inside the National museum, but I only have a couple of photos from that excursion.

A throne:
A brief moment to pause and pitch some tightly clad royal booty.



I don't know why we only have a couple of photos from the national museum. It was packed with fascinating objects. Maybe the lack of photos reflects how exhausted we were from all the sight seeing. That night we ate some very good Nepalese food and went back to the room. I stayed up too late watching French news and bad reality TV. It was fantastic. The only horrible part was watching a french news reporter interview a man from Iowa (or maybe it was Kansas). The farmer called Obama the 'n' word, and I was shocked! shocked! The farmer said he was a life long democrat, but wouldn't vote for Obama b/c he "can't stand n!@@*rs". WTF?!!



Okay, on to the next day....

Monday wasn't as rainy as Sunday, but the day was still very grey. This means the photos look kind of gloomy, but Helsinki was a very beautiful city. Here are some photos as we walked around visiting churches and just generally ogling the city.





The massive Lutheran church.
I like this photo b/c Patrick's noggin is floating around the bottom.

The above photo is theview from the top of the stairs to the Lutheran Church.
Inside the Lutheran Church.



This photo above is the Orthodox Church. We didn't get to go inside, sadly, but it was an impressive building none the less.

This is the view from the Orthodox church. They could flip off the Lutheran's on their way to mass.

We also walked around the market square of Helsinki where they sell handicrafts. It was pretty nice, and I bought a little wooden block puzzle for my nephew.

So, overall, we had a fantastic trip. Helsinki was wonderful. Turku was unbelievable. I loved the trip and wish we could've stayed longer.

It's been a while

Hello Internet Friends. It has been a while. I have been very busy with work and traveling. I have to say that this time in Finland has been very productive for me. I like my boss, and I think his work style is very good for me. He checks in a lot, which keeps me moving forward in my projects.

Anyway, I traveled to the Netherlands two weeks ago for the annual meeting of 'Dutch People for Antagonizing Americans Named Brooke' meeting. I was a fruitful meeting. Oh, I also saw my mom and my stepdad while I was there. We had a great time biking around, eating yummy food, visiting castles, watching the 7 up series, working puzzles, listening to podcasts, and shopping! I would normally post photos of the castle now, but they are on my laptop and I am at work. :( I will try to do that tonight.

The Saturday after returning from the Netherlands, I took a trip out to an old farmhouse with the Oulu knitting group. Man, that was a fun trip. The farmhouse is now a store:



It is a store with walls and walls of yarn!! yay!!




I bought some shiny silver yarn to make mittens and a hat for myself. It was a great outing. I got to see the country-side. We had coffee and sandwiches while we chatted. I met some really nice people. I have to say that knitters rock!








After our outing, I biked home and stopped every few hundred feet to look and take pictures of the trees. Fall is a beautiful time.







After all that fun, I had to put my nose to the grindstone at work. I'm frantically filling out job applications and fellowships in hopes of getting one. I've been watching the economy collapse with a mixture of fear and awe. I've also been wondering how I am going to carry all my yarn back to the states.

While I was in the Netherlands, my mother bought beautiful wool yarn for me to make a sweater that I like. It is a birthday gift. I've started the sweater (I will post pictures later), and I'm falling in love with it already. But, it is a thick sweater. I'm going to have to dump my books and other clothes to bring this sweater home. But, it will be worth it.

Speaking of birthdays, tomorrow I turn 34! huzah! Patrick and I will probably go out to eat and enjoy the Irish Festival going on downtown. It should be fun.

Well, this blog was a lot longer than I had intended. But, it has been a while.

"I think I've got some clips you should see"

Falling in love with Finland

The weather has been beautiful this weekend. Blue skies with fluffy clouds. Temperatures in the 60s. niiice.

Saturday, Patrick and I rode our bikes to downtown Oulu. We checked out the local library, which has a large selection of novels written in English. I am interested in borrowing a book on 19th-century gothic tales. It sounds like fun. The nights are getting longer and darker here, so I am in the mood for creepy stories.

After visiting the library, we biked to the gardens. We sat down to have a cup of tea and a little snack. Patrick read while I knitted, and we listened to children laughing and playing. It was very nice. We walked around for a bit and admired the gardens, which had some gorgeous roses in a variety of shades.

It was a perfect day. yay!

The air is thick with ümlauts

Patrick and I just watched the Colbert Report for August 14th. On an aside note, August 14 is my MUCH older brother's birthday -- Happy Birthday, Steven!!

Anyway, during the Report, Colbert mentioned Finland as a country of interest.

Check it out:


Finland has been put on notice! We know what your up to.

we know.

The United Nations of Knitting.

Thank God for the interweb -- the evil creature that sucks away my life and gives me a life all at the same time. As I mentioned before, I am a member of Ravelry, which is an awesome community of knitters and crocheters. I did a people search for Oulu, Finland and up popped 2 pages of people. yay!

I picked an avatar I liked (Marika) and e-mailed her asking for locations of good yarn shops with my fingers crossed. She was so friendly and immediately took me under her wing. I am so grateful. I had no idea how I was going to find shops or fellow knitters since I am too shy to approach people in English.

Well, the knitting group here seems large and lively. We had an impromptu gathering yesterday at Sanna's house. I am kicking myself for not taking a photo, but I did forget. We sat in the garden with a beautiful spread of cake, cookies, tea, and coffee. A total of 9 of us ( and two wee ones ) sat in a sunny garden and knitted away. I am in between projects right now, so I didn't really have anything to work on. I fiddled with my yarn a bit while I chatted and admired everyone's skills.

I have to say that I think I will be learning a lot from these ladies. They have mad skills and make BEAUTIFUL socks and mittens and cowls and sweaters. I was, honestly, pretty embarrassed about my knitting level in comparison. I tend to make silly toys and big goofy scarves. But, I look at it as an opportunity to learn from some experienced knitters. And the best part of it all was that I really felt like I clicked with them. They were very chatty and made a big effort to include me into the conversations. I am looking forward to the next meeting.

The Family Circus

I've been procrastinating all day. The sky is clear and blue. The temperature is perfect, but I am sitting inside wishing I were out there. :( So, instead of working, I have been looking for knitting patterns. I've finally picked up the knitting needles again. woo hoo! I'm falling in love with knitting all over again.

I'm almost done knitting the Hallowig I started a looong time ago. It looks like this: And the pattern can be found on the Knitty website

I will post a photo once I am done. It looks like I knitted it a little too small. Maybe I will send it to my sister and force her to put it on my nephew for a laugh. That's mean, but we have to have some photos to torture him with when he's a stinky teenager.

Anyway, I am so close to being done that I am already looking for my next pattern. I am a member of an awesome knitting website called Ravelry. I have found so many patterns for adorable toys, hats, mittens, scarves, etc. You name it. They've got it.

I am interested in making a Jayne hat from the TV show Firefly:


However, I have been particularly interested in knitting the geekier patterns such as

crocheting the Lorentz manifold from a paper from Bristol University website. I think this might be a cool gift for my stepdad.

Another idea is to take a word or phase and convert it to binary code. Binary code can be translated into a knitting pattern by using purl for 0 and knit for 1. This way, you can knit a secret message into your scarf. I like that idea.

Or I could just these socks from Knitty

You wouldn't believe the cute patterns they have on Ravelry. hmm. Maybe you would believe it. Do you even care about knitting? lol. Sorry if you don't. I am just so excited to have the time to knit again. I didn't list nearly all the patterns I'd like to make. Others include the Bender Bending Rodriguez doll, sushi, a mushroom, a wonder woman sweater (way out of my league), and Shaun the Sheep from Wallace and Grommit.

So, why is this blog titled 'The Family Circus'? Because during my search for patterns, I ran across this Funny Cartoon poking fun at the family circus: It's funny to me b/c everyday as I lock the house, I step back inside to check that the coffee maker is off. I know it is off. When I turn it off I say to myself 'see, you turned it off. So, no need to check when you leave'. However, standing at the door, I am no longer certain I didn't say that yesterday. woo hoo...dontcha just LOVE developing OCD tendencies?! I don't! :D

Ok, back to work...

Kentucky -- Where Katy's Come From

Patrick and I spent two days in Kentucky. I've never spent significant time in Kentucky before, and I really liked it. GORGEOUS is the one word that comes to mind. We camped at and visited Cumberland Falls. Here are photos of our campground:


Isn't Kentucky purty?



Now here is the sad part. I was floored with a sinus infection or something similarly icky which meant I slept all day. I woke up long enough to walk to the falls.

See! That's me on walking to the falls! HI!


Here is Patrick putting a move on the rock wall.



And here is the waterfall:


When I viewed the waterfall from above I could see and feel a mist created by the falling water. Within the mist, I also saw a rainbow. Apparently, Cumberland Falls is super psyched about the fact that you can see a similar Moonbow at night during the full moon on a clear night.

We happened to be at Cumberland Falls during a full moon. But, we were too preoccupied with blowing our noses and trying to get some quality sleep to witness the moonbow. But the word on the trail is that we didn't miss anything. Some random kid who didn't know us from Adam walked past us and said "The Moonbow is crap". haha.

But, here is a photo I borrowed from a website called My Life in Focus that proves the moonbow is real and certainly not crap!



I wish I had seen it. Another time perhaps. If you ever get to see it, let me know.

We've now moved on the state that is round on both ends and HI in the middle -- OHIO!! woot!! You know you love it.

What I love about OHIO is the private shower and toilet in this hotel room. I love not having to walk 1/8-mi to pee.